Wow guys, can you believe that Deeja is officially one years old! It feels like yesterday when she was a tiny baby, and now here she is, turning into a toddler. It’s times like these that make me realise that time really isn’t staying still for anyone, it’s a thing that cannot be seen, yet when you look at your children grow… you notice time a lot more.
So as the post title says Reflecting on a whole year, I think it’s time to delve into this whole year of Deeja’s life and see how she has grown into this little person, but not only that, it’s time to reflect upon how I have grown or changed as a person.
Sunday 13th March, at 5:13am Khadija was born into the world, that first cry made it even more real as she showed me and her dad how good a pair of lungs she had. As tired as we were from staying up over 48hours, we were awake because our parental instincts had kicked in at first sight of our little girl. It was like a kick from nature, I felt a strong connection with this tiny baby even though I had only held her for 5minutes.
My first night at the hospital without my husband went a little something like this:
1. Sets alarm for every hour of the night.
2. Wakes up before the alarm every time.
3. Checks Khadija to see if she is still breathing. Thank god she is. (My OCD was on high alert).
4. Shit my pants when the midwife walked in to check baby whilst I slept. (I hate being woken by anyone standing beside me).
Once we were sent home, I can tell you that our first few weeks were very tiring from all the countless night feeds, and nappy changes. Our little bug also loved to be held chest to chest as she slept, which meant I would drift off for a few seconds during the night whilst sat up holding her. Thankfully my OH was always awake with me and would give me a nudge so he could place her back in her Moses basket.
When Deeja turned 3months old we had moved out from living with my parent in laws, and shifted into our own house. Scary times I can admit, especially with Ramadan just 3weeks away. I went from living in a house of luxuries (wifi, television, you name it), to just me, my OH and the baby. It took somewhere between one or two months for us to have setup wifi, decide and buy a television we both like, and to make our house feel more Like a home. In that space of time I learnt that I am not dependent upon technology to get me through my day, I felt content and happy spending the day with my baby and bonding. Sometimes it’s nice to take a step away from the world of technology and focus on the real things around us.
At the five month mark I found myself to have more independence as Deeja began to roll, and sit unaided. Once she was able to move around the living room rug by rolling around, she no longer relied on me to hold her in my arms as much for comfort, she was becoming more confident and enjoying her surroundings. This allowed me to sit back and relax a little, I guess it was also a little upsetting for me knowing that my baby is growing up so fast and won’t rely on me as much. However the fun part was watching her doing 360 turns around the room, and watching her pull the most absurd faces as she tested out her tastebuds on smooth food purée (the weaning phase started at the six month mark for us).
Once Deeja hit the Seven month mark she had figured out how to crawl, this was a relief for us, especially since the last four weeks involved placing soft cushions and throws on the floor because she was lunging face first to reach places. From then on it was Go Go Go! As soon as she was moving there was no stopping her, Deeja was always on the get go, crawling around the house, touching things she shouldn’t be touching (dad’s PlayStation), and crawling under the table. During this month we put up our safety gates to stop our little adventurer from testing out the stairs, and we kept her out of the kitchen.
Times flies by when your child starts moving around, within weeks she had her first two teeth, which was a nightmare! Who would have thought that the teething stage could be so awful, we had not slept in weeks because her first two teeth were being too stubborn to erupt through the gum, therefore causing Deeja to scream in pain, cry and poop a lot. What does that leave you with? Two adults who are sleep deprived, make no sense when they talk because their brains are functioning at a 10% capacity and are still managing to look alive… somehow. I was so grateful when the first part of this stage passed. I say first part because baby’s continue to teeth in stages, so it’s like a recurring nightmare.
At the eight month mark Deeja was able to pull herself up whilst holding onto objects, and move around holding onto the sofas. At that moment I can honestly say hand on heart that I thought I had seen it all and I would not get all tearey eyed at her next accomplishment. Oh how wrong I was! Just eleven months old she took her first step towards me, and I cried! I did not see that one happening. To our surprise, she has now decided to forget learning to walk, but has taken to climbing anything that she is able to get her leg over.
We are now in the present time, and have a one year old on our hands, a toddler to say. What have I learnt? A lot! I’ve learnt that I am stronger physically and emotionally than I ever thought I was, by giving birth to our daughter I have proved to myself that I am strong, and my body is not as weak as I imagined. I have realised that I don’t need technology to keep me occupied, yes it’s a Good time pass, but so is interacting with your loved ones. I have learnt that I can handle responsibility well, and able to hold my position as woman of the house, wife, mother and much more. I have improved on my cooking skills, and become my own critic. Some might laugh at that, but I find it rather interesting that I am so brutally honest about my cooking, even though my OH and Deeja enjoy eating my cooked meals.
One important thing I have taken from this journey is that I am constantly trying to be the best role model I can be for my child, even if that means taking a stand against something I dislike. A parent is more than a word, it refers to someone who cares for a child, has taken the role of a teacher to teach that child how to grow as a person, it is a person that places this child before themselves, and will continue to do so until they physically can. I hope one day Deeja can read this post and see how much we love her, and have memorised her every step as though it will be the last time we see it.
Love from mummy and daddy