Here we go again, it’s that time of year when all the viruses from wherever it is they come from; decide to attack each and every one of us. It’s like watching the plague in full effect. First you’ll notice some snotty nose child in school with boogers you just can’t miss, one sneeze from him and you’ve got a breeding ground. Wait 24hours and all the germs have multiplied over a gazillion times, wiping out half a class of children, over 48hours the whole school is taken out, including teachers and parents; who have been subjected to the virus from their children. All you’ll see is empty classrooms, and a dry tumbleweed rolling down the hallway, all from being defeated by one snotty nose kid carrying the dastardly virus, also known as The Cold.
We have been swarmed by the virus in our house, as you might have noticed from all of my regular instagram feeds; showing Little K looking more on the rough side. Damn you snotty nosed kid and whoever infected you with the virus, now the whole of the UK is under attack. What started off as a lovely Saturday, ended with some big tears and lots of coughing from Little K, followed by the contents of her stomach all over our bedroom carpet and my shoulder. Nice.
Come Tuesday and we seemed to have a child that resembled an 80year old lady with a croaky cough, a wheezing chest and very big eye bags. Not only was Little K looking very rough, she was now super clingy, so when poor me decided that I can’t hold my bladder any longer incase it explodes, what was only a 30 second pit stop to the toilet turned into a screaming contest which seemed to go on forever. One scream sounding like an old lady doing opera with a sore throat and a cough that gave the impression of a cat choking on a hair ball. So I broke, for the rest of my toilet breaks, I was now taking Little K to the bathroom and sitting her right by the door, I can tell you how uncomfortable it is to be stared at by your child as you try to wee in peace. I’m going to act like its totally normal to sit your child by the bathroom door as you do your business, and get stared at by your child, whilst you try to hide the small remnants of dignity you might have left. Our conversations from the bathroom went something like this:
Little K stares at mom whilst she is sat on the toilet, starts to clap as soon as she hears me going. Edges forwards to come inside the bathroom.
Me: Nooo Khadija, stay there honey.
Khadija: totally ignores mom and makes a break for it towards me.
Me: (murmurs the F word), okay but stay there and please PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD don’t come here.
Thankfully I was done before she made a second break for it, sometimes I think I need to buy a playpen to put outside the bathroom for emergencies like these.
Since Saturday we have all been drugging up on paracetamol and chugging down water as though we have been dehydrated for years. It’s obvious that no food was made in our house on Tuesday, and we were fast ordering from our local takeaway. My OH at his usual random tricks, decided that we should wet a sponge and place it over the radiator at night, that way it will keep the air moist and open up our airways. As a woman of the house, seeing some random wet sponge on the radiator in our bedroom was tipping me off the edge, how dare he make a mess in our room! Unfortunately as I was half dead and feeling very frail, humiliated from having Little K share bathroom trips with me, the clean freak in me decided to call it a day and allow the sponge to stay the night. The next morning we are feeling a little better, more energetic and seem to have had a surprise tooth appear over night in Little K mouth. Maybe that’s why she was feeling more cranky than usual?
Even though we are not fully recovered from the plague, we feel a lot better, but still snappy. Occasionally we will hear Little K shouting at us for no reason, and then laying on the floor mimicking a crime scene. Whereas me and the OH are tolerating each other to some extent, secretly judging the other when it gets a bit too much, or when the tiredness kicks in. Man I love my bed! It’s come to my attention that to avoid the plague, we need to avoid all contact with the snotty nose boy / girl, and if you do happen to come into contact with him, please PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STAY AWAY FROM US!
Follow us on instagram, at Shakila.kosar, See you in another post soon.
Little K & Mum